Online Dating in the ’90s: Leigh & Steve | Part 3


(happy tranquil music) – We met initially on match.com That had been around it was I think 1998. I was going to Texas University
at the time, do my masters. And it was a women’s university so I didn’t think there was a whole lot of opportunities to meet men. So, I thought match.com
might be a useful tool. So I filled out the profile. And he was one of a couple profiles that popped up as a match for me. And so I started e-mailing, and we started talking through e-mails and like the third e-mail I asked him where do you go to church
and he put (muffled speaking) And I was like, huh, that’s where I go, why haven’t I seen you? He said, “Well, you know, “I’m on business a lot and I travel.” I was like, okay, so we
talked quite a bit more and then we talked on the
phone for a long time. And then he asked me out
and we met face to face. And I remember this was back before you could upload pictures. – I still remember you
when I saw her by the way. And to be clear, I got
her on my free trial. – Yeah, he always likes to bring that out. – I literally like, surfing
the internet at home, and there was a pop-up there. Well, you could meet singles in your area. I felt it was the time and
I had just moved to Dallas. I was like, yeah, what the heck. So I clicked on it and it said, you know, fill our this profile thing so I did, and. Most of the profiles didn’t
have pictures back then. And so you just had to read profiles, so I read, I don’t know, a dozen when I saw hers I was
like she sounds cool. – So on my profile when I wrote it out, was basically just general
statistically, you know, age, gender, do you have kids,
have you been married before? – She’s a scientist. – Yes, I know. And then you just gave like
a brief personal statement, or personal summary about yourself. And you know, what you like to do and what makes you, you. Maybe what your job was currently. I think they even asked like
height and weight, maybe? – No, it asked for like– – Oh, how do you describe yourself. – Yeah, and it was like
athletic, thin, stuff like that. – Right, that’s what it was. Yeah, we had to kind of
describe if you were, yeah, sedentary, athletic, or kind of between. – So, mine of course, were
super muscular, really tall, very serious. – We had our first date at
a bar in downtown Dallas. And we had such a great time, he asked me out for the very next day. And I said, well, maybe if you go to Easter Sunday service with me on Sunday. So, I went out with him again on Saturday and I met his two brothers
that night, as well. And then Easter Sunday service we met up at the church we were going to. And it just happened that
both my parents were in town and his parents were in town and so we met each others
parents on the third date. Eventually, the third
date we were together. – So by Monday, done deal. (slow music) – When I was diagnosed with cancer, we had been together for about a year. And we had gotten really
close at the time already. We pretty much knew at the time, I think, that we were probably gonna
get married, eventually. During that time, when I found out Steve came back immediately,
he was out of town on business. It was a really rough form of uterine leiomyosarcoma uterine cancer. It was a stage four. And, I told Steve at the time, I was like, no, listen, I don’t know if I’m going to
be alive in the next few years. Even if I am, I won’t be
able to have children. And so, I completely
understand if you want to, you know, leave and go find someone else. But, he said, “No, I
just want you to survive, “I love you and I’m gonna
stay with you no matter what.” So, he stayed with me, and I thought, well, he’s a keeper, I
think I should marry him. (slow music) – So the first six years we were married, we were apart for a year because of deployments and doing training. So, once 9/11 happened, I reenlisted. Went to the officer training. While I was going
through officer training, I got in a really bad car
crash in a military vehicle. We were crushed by an 18 wheeler. – There’s a movie where
the lady gets a call in the middle of fire, a live fire. I got one of those calls, it
was really, really super scary. – Well, there was no fire when we first started talking in
the (muffled speaking). – But there could be leaking fire. So, yeah, it’s pretty scary. But, I was kinda glad I was doing my PhD, because I was really focused at the time on that and it kinda allowed
me a little bit of an escape. So, I wasn’t constantly clear on thinking about what was going on with him. But when he came back, there was a lot of adjustments from you know, being deployed. When I met Steve online,
I really didn’t have high hopes that I would
have a match so quickly. And for us to grow close together so quickly was pretty shocking. Especially to find somebody
who was so supportive and so close of a match
to myself was amazing. – I think the perception at the time was oh you must be really
desperate or socially awkward if you need to go online to meet people. But, I think, in fact, I think your mom
was embarrassed at first. – Oh, she– – She did, she was like it’s not good to say that you met online. She said that. – Yeah, so at our wedding my mom definitely didn’t
want the preacher, who was actually my uncle, to
say that we met on match.com, it was really embarrassing for her. (laughs) – She’s awesome, though. – She is great.

Danny Hutson

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *