Key & Peele – Text Message Confusion – Uncensored

Key & Peele – Text Message Confusion – Uncensored


– “BEEN TRYING TO REACH OUT
TO YOU ALL DAY. ARE WE ON FOR TONIGHT?” [sighs]
JEEZ. – WHAT?
YOU CAN’T CATCH ME. YOU CAN’T CATCH ME. I’M LANCE MOORE.
TOUCHDOWN, BITCH. WHAT?
PAUSE. [phone chimes] OH, SHOOT. KEEGAN’S BEEN TEXTING ME. “SORRY, DUDE,
MISSED YOUR TEXTS. “I ASSUMED WE’D MEET AT THE BAR. WHATEVER.
I DON’T CARE.” [phone chimes] – “SORRY, DUDE,
MISSED YOUR TEXTS. “I ASSUMED WE’D MEET AT THE BAR. WHATEVER.
I DON’T CARE.” “WHATEVER. I DON’T CARE”? WHAT THE FUCK IS HIS PROBLEM? “DO YOU EVEN WANT TO HANG OUT?” – “DO YOU EVEN WANT
TO HANG OUT?” OH, THAT’S CONSIDERATE. “LIKE I SAID, WHATEVER.” – “LIKE I SAID, WHATEVER”? FUCK THIS GUY. JESUS, “YOU…” – “ARE FUCKING PRICELESS.” AWW.
“YOU’RE THE…” – “ONE WHO’S FUCKING PRICELESS”? THIS M– THIS MOTHERFUCKER HERE. OH, HE WANTS TO–
OKAY, MM-HMM. MM-HMM.
OKAY. “YOU WANT TO GO…” – “RIGHT NOW?” HMM. GUESS I COULD DO THAT. [clears throat] “OKAY…” – “OKAY, LET’S GO”? HE SAID OKA–
“OKAY, LET’S GO”? ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU KNOW WHAT?
“YOU WANT TO REALLY…” – “DO THIS NOW?”
KEEGAN, YOU NUT. YOU’RE NOT PUTTING ME OUT. – “FUCK YEAH, LET’S DO IT”? OH, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! – “FIRST ROUND’S MINE.” – OH, NO!
OH, NO! THERE AIN’T GONNA BE
NO ROUNDS, ASSHOLE! IT’S GONNA BE
A FUCKING STREET FIGHT! THIS SON OF A– – ♪ ‘CAUSE TONIGHT WE GONNA
PARTY AND THE PARTY DON’T STOP ♪ – YOU! – BUDDY! LIKE I SAID, FIRST ROUND’S MINE. A BEER AND A GIMLET
FOR MY PARTNER RIGHT– WHAT’S THAT? – UH, I-I GOT YOU
A BASEBALL BAT WITH NAILS IN IT. – FOR MY POST-APOCALYPTIC
JACKIE ROBINSON COSTUME. HOW DID YOU KNOW?

Danny Hutson

100 thoughts on “Key & Peele – Text Message Confusion – Uncensored

  1. I just noticed Jordan Peele is singing the party all night lmfao parody song they did in that other sketch. Funny little detail.

  2. Honestly you look so much like deadpool in the intro photo thing. I don't know what to call it, I guess its called a thumbnail.

  3. Mad aside this scene turned me on to the show. These Geniuses can stretch out the smallest microcosm of life in a very brilliant different way constantly. Consistently bringing the fuckin heat, even the toss away jokes when they're just fucking around. Big part of my comedic fungus as a single 29 YO' reluctant white person from Indiana. Just illuminating their vast reach and relateability

  4. This is totally me and my best friend. I always think she is mad in her text messages because I perceive a tone that isn't there lol

  5. One friend does this to the point they question your response because they don't recall what they've text.

    I get ghost

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