Key & Peele – Insult Comic

Key & Peele – Insult Comic


[cheers and applause] – THANK YOU, SIR. ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT, HOW’S EVERYBODY–
HOW’S EVERYBODY DOING? [cheers] ALL RIGHT,
AND YOU GUYS CAN ALL HEAR ME OKAY?
all: YEAH. – I KNOW THIS GUY
CAN RIGHT HERE. BOY, THIS GUY’S EARS
ARE SO BIG, HE’S LAUGHING AT JOKES
FROM THE YUK-YUK CLUB ALL THE WAY
ON THE OTHER SIDE OF TOWN. [laughter] ALL RIGHT. AND YOU, SIR,
YOU’RE DOING OKAY? AND YOU’RE GETTING ENOUGH
TO EAT? IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE? [laughter] THANK YOU, SIR. FOLKS, I’M SORRY, I’M GONNA GET EVERYBODY TONIGHT. NOBODY IS SAFE.
I’M GETTING EVERYBODY. EXCEPT FOR YOU, SIR.
I’M GONNA LEAVE YOU ALONE. JUST LIKE YOUR DATE DID TONIGHT.
HELLO! HUH?
ALL RIGHT. OKAY, WHO’S NEXT? WHO IS NEXT? HEY, MA’AM, I GET IT,
YOU HAVE BREASTS, OKAY? JEEZ, I MEAN,
LOOK AT THIS CHICK OVER HERE. HER CLEAVAGE IS GIVING
THE GRAND CANYON AN INFERIORITY COMPLEX. [laughter] – [computerized voice]
YOU SKIPPED ME. – WHO’S TALKING RIGHT NOW? – DO ME. – YEAH, HEY, MAN. LOOK AT THAT PINK SHIRT
YOU GOT ON THERE. WOW, WHERE’D YOU GET THAT?
QUEERTSHIRTS.COM? – IT’S IN SUPPORT
OF BREAST CANCER AWARENESS. I AM GAY, THOUGH. – OKAY. – GO FOR IT. I CAN TAKE IT. – HMM?
OH, YEAH, YEAH. NO, HEY, YEAH, DON’T YOU WORRY
ABOUT THAT, MAN. GLOVES ARE COMING OFF. OKAY. RIGHT THERE, RIGHT THERE, WHAT’S
WITH THE THREE DRINKS, MAN? ALCOHOLIC MUCH? – THIS
IS MY PAIN MEDICATION. – OF [bleep] COURSE IT IS. IT’S YOUR PAIN MEDICATION. ‘CAUSE HE IS IN PAIN. RIGHT NOW. – MAKE FUN OF THE BURNS. – MAKE FUN OF THE–
WHAT DID YOU SAY? BECAUSE HERE’S THE PROBLEM, SIR,
IS IT’S REALLY DARK IN HERE, AND, SORRY, ARE YOU BURNED?
BECAUSE I CAN’T MAKE IT OUT. THANKS SO MUCH, MA’AM,
FOR ILLUMINATING HIM. THANK YOU.
THAT’S–I APPRECIATE THAT. OH, THOSE BURNS.
– MAKE FUN OF THE ROBOT VOICE. – SIR, I DON’T KNOW. – COME ON,
I CAN TAKE IT. – OKAY, WELL, NO,
YOU KNOW WHAT? I FEEL–
– OR THE WHEELCHAIR. – LOOK, SIR,
THERE IS NOTHING FUNNY ABOUT YOU BEING
IN A WHEELCHAIR, AND WE CAN ALL–
– OH, BUT THERE IS SOMETHING FUNNY ABOUT ME BEING FAT? – ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT, FINE. FINE. I’VE GOT IT.
I’VE GOT IT. I’M DOING IT.
I’M DOING IT. I JUST DIDN’T WANT TO GO
AFTER THIS GUY ‘CAUSE I DIDN’T WANT HIM
TO KILL ME IN MY DREAMS. LIKE FREDDY KRUEGER. [exclamations] – COME ON. – ‘CAUSE–NO? YOU KNOW, ‘CAUSE HOW FREDDY
KRUEGER’S FACE IS BURNED OFF. THAT’S NOT… – [sobs] – YOU ASS[bleep].
– HE SAID HE COULD TAKE IT. THAT’S WHAT HE SAID. – I THOUGHT I COULD,
BUT I CAN’T. – HOW IS THIS ON ME? HOW DO WE EVEN KNOW
IF HE’S CRYING RIGHT NOW? [all booing] I DON’T KNOW THAT SOUND. IT JUST SOUNDS
LIKE AN ELECTRONIC SOUND. – THE TEARS,
THEY BURN. – HE SAID HE COULD TAKE IT.
HE S– [cheers and applause]

Danny Hutson

100 thoughts on “Key & Peele – Insult Comic

  1. Or he could say “if Hollywood ever decides on a new scarface movie, you wouldn’t even need to audition for the part of Tony Montana”

  2. This sketch is so good when most comment is phrasing and complementing the dialogue/joke, instead of talking about the girl bewbs…

  3. Did anyone else think the guy he said was gonna leave alone looked like Tony Ferguson with glasses and bushbrows? Lol I swear I did at first glance

  4. This sketch brought me to tears with laughter! 😂😂😂😂😂
    He said he could take it! How do we even know he's crying?

  5. You sick f..

    My belly hurts with laughter though. I can’t breath.
    02:15 the way he turns away from the light like John Merrick

  6. Looks like a fat Albert toy that's been left in the sun too long . Didn't his mom give birth to him or s*** him out ? With a crowd hostile I'm going to hide in his mama's ass . It's warm it's dark in the stink left with him .

  7. saw a burn victim the other day and my 3 and a half year old kid walked up to him and said, "sir, did you go to hell"..the shameee..but he was pretty cool about it though..kids..

  8. If the comedian would have been the “purist” Dave Chapelle, he wouldn’t have given a shit and he would have picked on everybody including the burned guy and he would have made everybody laugh…

  9. I died ☠️ when he started crying robotically the rest was pretty funny but that's what sparked my real laughter! You liar you said you can take it! 🤥

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