[Phone Ringing] Hello Eternia Internet. Salutations. It is I, Skeletor! I am having the darndest time getting my sequential operation device synced up with the global communication network. Whoa whoa buddy, slow down.
What? My computer won’t log on to the internet you pitiful pinhead! Well I’m sorry, let’s see if we can take care of that for you. I shall hope you can, you mumbling maroon. Did you try unplugging the modem? That’s the first thing I tried you hebetudinous halfwit! Okay, where are you located? My snake Mountain Castle you crackbrained cretin! My system is not showing an
outage at snake Mountain. Um, are you using our modem or yours? I use my own Skeletor Modem you soft-headed stooge! Hmm. That might be the problem let’s try
something. How about you turn off the computer connected to the Wi-Fi. Uh huh. Now unplug the modem. Uh huh. Do you see any loose cables on the ground? No I don’t see any loose cables on the ground you gagged-up goon! Great. Plug the modem back in. Uh huh. Turn your computer back on. Uh huh. Is the computer on? Yes my computer’s on you festering fool! Uh, ok. Great. Now go to a website you would normally go to. Did it work? Of course it didn’t you dullardious dope! Okay, we’re gonna have to refresh your IP address. I’ll refresh you, you run-of-the-mill rockbrain! Are you PC or Mac? PC you birdbrain buffoon!! God they have Windows 10. Okay so go to Control Panel. Uh huh. Then manage network connections. Uh huh. Look for the Local Area Connection tab.
Do you see that? Yes- Yes I see the tab, you trivial tool! Under Internet Protocol, go to Properties. Uh huh. Is the IP Server set to obtain automatically? Uh huh. What about the DNS Server? Both servers are set automatically,
you scatterbrained sap! Okay, um, under IP & DNS make sure all boxes are checked except for Appending DNS suffixes. I’ll append you, you erroneous airhead. Providing everything is checked
and the WINS box is empty, it should work. Is the internet fixed? I- Hold on. Let me check. No it’s not fixed you feeble-minded foul-up!!! Huh. Well, there must be no service in your area. Of course there’s no service you know-nothing numbskull!! We’ll have a technician come out and take a look. Oh my god, when’s the earliest anyone can come out? Let me check… Tomorrow. Tomorrow?!?! You fix it today you listless, lumbering louse! Tomorrow’s the earliest time any of our technicians are available. Well this is just great you good-for-nothing goon! Alright thanks for calling Eternia Internet. Have a nice day. I don’t have nice da– [Dial Tone]

Danny Hutson

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *